Most of us aren’t concerned with ensuring that if we wear shorts and someone is walking behind us that they know which team we root for.
Then again, most of us aren’t Bama fans.
Meet our newest awkward fan photo to star a Bama fan.
This picture was snapped by Nashville singer/songwriter Ellie Holcomb at the Nashville Flea Market. She forwarded it to me a couple of days ago and it made my day.
Now it’s making yours.
How many ways do we love this photo?
Let’s count the ways.
1. There are many signs you have given up on life. Here are two: You wear jorts to the flea market.
Here are two more: a. Roll b. Tide.
2. This guy has definitely uttered the phrase: “Left leg, roll, right leg, tide, bitch.”
Probably while kicking each leg up into the air and ending the phrase with a karate chop.
3. Not pictured: mullet.
We know it’s there though, don’t we?
4. I couldn’t have made a location joke for this photo funnier than the Nashville flea market.
And it’s real life.
Bama fans are just a cliche.
5. He celebrated the big win over LSU, by exclaiming repeatedly, “LS-who! LS-who! LS-who!”
He only stopped when someone knocked on his trailer door and he feared it was the probation officer.
6. This guy is a Bama fan in Nashville.
There’s a 100% chance he listens to 3HL and thinks I’m gay.
There is a 48% chance he has Tweeted “your gay,” to me before.
7. He’s walking behind a woman who appears to have a perm from 1984.
This woman wants to leave her boyfriend, but is afraid that if she does, he will release the VHS sex tape where she pretends to be Nick Saban.
8. He chose to wear long sleeves and a hoodie, but continues to wear shorts.
He also wears shorts on every day of the year and when asked why he does so as he stands shivering outside the Jiffy Lube, he responds, “My legs don’t never get cold.”
9. There is a child being pushed in the stroller.
There’s a 97% chance that this child will be the subject of a Maury Povich “Who’s Your Daddy?” special.
10. He’s wearing British Knights low-top sneakers.
11. At some point he and this guy are bound to fight.
Courtsey of emailer Matt, “I took this photo at Wal Mart in Alabama.”
Of course he did.
12. There appear to be additional tattoos on the sides of the Bama flea marketer’s legs.
No doubt the Bama logo, so if you happen to see the side of his leg as opposed to his calf, you aren’t confused as to which team his side leg roots for.
13. What will this family leave the flea market having purchased?
Books are a substantial underdog.
I’m going with a picture of dogs playing pool and a two-sided t-shirt. “Whoomp there it is” on the back, “Got 14,” on the front.
But I need y’all’s hypotheses below.
Remember, at OKTC we ridicule all awkward fan photos equally.
Humor doesn’t discriminate — although it does feature Kentucky and Alabama fans at alarming frequency.
As always, feel free to share your awkward fan photos by emailing or tweeting them to me. firstname.lastname@example.org or the Twitter feed on the right side of the page, @claytravisbgid.