Clay’s Jon Gruden Diary: Day Two

Dear Diary,

The offshore coaching odds markets continue to favor Jon Gruden as the next coach of the University of Tennessee, but Memphis’s Mike Norvell is now the second most likely coach to be hired.

Please tell me this is just a cruel joke and that Tennessee is not going to make another mosquito dick coaching hire.

If Tennessee hires Mike Norvell I may have to retire as a Tennessee fan because I honestly can’t take another four years of the same damn storyline from Derek Dooley and Butch Jones. “You have to give him time.” And “He’s building something special, it’s too soon to judge him,” and all this bullshit.

I honestly can’t take another year of this.

Much less five or ten years.

Don’t juice bar me, bro.  We need a helicopter dick coach and we need him now.

Here are the latest Tennessee coaching odds from Bet Online, which you can see for yourself here.

44830 Chip Kelly +500
44831 Jeff Brohm +1000
44832 Bobby Petrino +1200
44833 Mike Norvell +250
44834 PJ Fleck +1200
44835 Tee Martin +1600
44836 Les Miles +500
44837 Jim Bob Cooter +2000
44838 Dan Mullen +450
44839 Brian Kelly +5000
44840 Peyton Manning +5000
44841 Lane Kiffin +3300
44842 Jon Gruden +180
44843 Mike MacIntyre +1200

In related news, some haters in the national media are saying Tennessee fans pining for Jon Gruden are being delusional. But you know what? These are the same people who said man would never walk on the moon or that a 38 year old dad couldn’t redefine male fashion by wearing a windbreaker/pullover combo from 2002 in 2017.

Well, boom!

It’s Grudenator time, bitches.

Stay strong.*

*Seriously, if we hire Mike Norvell I am going to throw up. And if we hire Mike Fucking Bobo I might become an Ohio State or Alabama fan.

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